through the eyes...

a strange thing happened to me last sunday at our community's mission area in Kinoguitan, Misamis Oriental. the CLS (christian life seminar / 2nd batch) was on its 8th talk and all but one more session is needed to complete the seminar given out to 6 couples (cfc-ffl), 16 handmaids (hfl), 2 single's (sfl), 2 servant's (svfl). quite a harvest and a confirmation of God's awesome strength and blessings to a young, dynamic and vibrant community in esperanza... and while all the participants and service team was busy having fellowship with one another, i started putting back things that we used to their former order as was the custom after use of the chapel after each session. and while i was up to it, i noticed a group of elderly sisters (hfl's) converging on the chapel rectory for some much needed snacks. after finishing up, i decided to join them and had this lively little discussion with one of the sisters... to us from cdo she was sister freda, to the esperanzans, she was nanay freda. a sprightly lady a few years above 70 probably and as i came to know was one of the more notorious citizens of this seaside barangay during her heydays. she was beaming that day and was so animated in her stories on how our God answered all her prayers since joining up with the community as a member of the very 1st batch of CLS graduates of this barangay. i cant help but be amazed at how she was so thankful and even boasted how she was branded as a "maldita" once by her very own husband and neighbors. it was like that for about 30 mins and could have gone on if it weren't time for us to go back home to cdo. her parting words was what stopped me on my tracks as i was about to step out of the chapel rectory... she was thanking me/us for all the time and effort we have spent in going there week in and week out, she was likewise so animated on how she would look up to sunday to see us all and hear God's messages that are being given to her by way of each session's speakers. she was so concerned about us being tired and all in our weekly sojourn that she always makes it a point to include our lot in her daily prayers... what struck me is the simple thank you, so sincere and heartfelt. i just told her that thank you's are not needed because we are just doing what God inspired us to do... on the way home, i cant help but reflect on her profuse thanks... in a way, i kinda remembered how this mission started. looking back, it has been almost a year when we first came to esperanza... now, the fruits are being harvested! God is so good!!!

this piece seeks to honor those who spent time, effort and resources to do mission work in esperanza... i wont thank you because servants need no thanks... and this likewise seeks to honor all the full timers who have spent time here helping us out. the work that we do here is but nothing as compared to your lot and in a very special way, y'all have been an inspiration to all of us, to me specially. but our work never stops here... theres more to do... workers are few... and fewer still are chosen. and as nanay freda would put it... "manghinaut mi nga dili mo masumhan sa paganhi dari sa esperanza, salamat kaayo! (sana hindi kayo magsawa ng kapupunta dito sa esperanza. maraming salamat!)

it is through the eyes of nanay freda that i came to see how big the work is for all of us... my prayer is that, may we never tire doing the work that God asked us all to do and may we always find happiness in doing God's work!

An open letter to my Son

hi anak... as you celebrate your birthday today, let me just put into writing some thoughts that came to mind of late. 14 years ago today, you came into this world and lit up my life with your presence. you were heaven sent to us then and still is today... God's loving answer to our prayers. you know back then, your mom was having difficulty conceiving due to an abnormality in her system... but the Lord was so good then that He granted us our hearts desire, that is to have children and gave us not only you but your two other siblings as well. Our Lord is always good and loving that despite of our different life now, you are still and will always be my little angel... well not so little na siguro. hehehe!

you are a teenager now anak... and i always marvel at the very fast rate of your growth... soon you will be taller than me. maybe a wee bit taller than your tito dennis when you reach your full growth. at this stage of your life, there will be many things that you might be curious about... just remember to ask yourself first this question before anything else: is it the right thing to do? if the answer falls on the affirmative, go! walang problema! if its the other way around, DON'T! kasi magkakaron ng problema. it is that simple. things might have been a whole lot different with me if i was able to ask myself that question back in the days... anyway, that will be another story in itself and hoping will not see print anywhere.

on the occassion of your birthday... let me just say these 2 things to you... people will forget what you have done, what you have said... but people will never forget how you made them feel. true wealth is not measured by the number of cars you have in the garage, or how big your house is nor how fat is your bank account... true wealth comes from the number of people who loves you and cares for you not because of something, but because you are you.

lastly, am so thankful that you are also into community life now, keep on serving our Lord in the best way you can... try to be a good example not just to your "adings" but to everybody you know. happy birthday anak... love you always!

daddi

Chicken came knocking at my door

at about this same time two years ago, i received an early christmas gift... an unexpected visit from my mom and youngest brother. my kid bro has business to do then here in mindanao and took my mother for an unexpected visit to us here... christmas came early for me then and made me so happy seeing them. what made me ecstatic was the visit of my mom whom i have not seen for quite a while back then and she made her short stay with us memorable by cooking for us my fave dish. 'twas a blast from the old lady and made my kids happy because i so bragged about their lola's cooking and that compared to her, i was just a neophyte, a beginner, an apprentice even. yup, learned the ropes of cooking from my old lady. it was a long, slow education that started when i was a head taller than our cooking stove.

recently, another blessing came and made me feel like its christmas again in october. just the other day, at about mid morning... i was thinking what i will cook for lunch and proceeded to open the fridge and only saw a bunch of vegetables... well, there was nothing there except cold water and those veggies anyway so i decided on a simple dish of guisadong sitaw at kalabasa (string beans and squash). as i was preparing everything, i thought that adding a few slices of chicken would somehow lighten the dish up but the problem was, there was no chicken. i glanced at the clock and saw that going to the market for a few slices of chicken was out of the question because of time constraints. as i was about to start cooking, a good friend from way back called unexpectedly and became the bearer of good news... we were going home to manila for the holidays! and our trip was being sponsored... yup, me and my kids! it was like WOW! what an early gift! i was speechless for a while and when i came to my senses, was so profuse with thanks for her generosity. it has been 5 years since my last visit home and my younger sister and other brother still hasn't seen or meet my youngest daughter who is 8 years old now. likewise, the last time they saw my 2 boys was when they were 3 and 1 yr old respectively, prior to our move here in mindanao. my 2 boys are 13 and 11 now. so you could just imagine how elated i am that they are going to finally meet their tita and tito and be able to see the hustle and bustle of the big city. this was so farthest from my mind... i do have plans to bring my kids back home but it was nowhere near and not even in the distant future. well, economics has got something to do with it and i am just so thankful to our Lord for this blessing.

and soon as we hung up, there was some loud knocking on my door and proceeded to open and see who it was... imagine my astonishment when i opened the door and saw my neighbor with a big smile on her face holding TWO BIG, FRESH CHICKENS!!! so happened that my other neighbor who was a poultry farm manager came and left for me those 2 pieces of chicken for FREE! so it was like WOW! and a double WOW even! God never really ceases to amaze me! what could i say... just THANK YOU LORD!

70 years

would you believe that an eagle can live up to 70 years! yes, 70 long years. but for the eagle to achieve that, he must undergo a very painful process of rebirth. you see, when an eagle reaches the age of about 40 years, he must decide whether to go on living or just die. when he grows old, his beak and the talons on his two feet curl up thus making hunting for food an impossibility, his feathers, because of his age, becomes sticky and makes flying very difficult. he is so dependent on these 3 parts of his body for his sustenance. and with this predicaments, the eagle must decide on a very radical and very painful decision, one that could challenge his very existence and his desire to go on living until he dies of old age. and if he does decide to go on living, he must undergo this very painful process: he will repeatedly strike his beak on a hard object, a rock for example, until his beak falls off. once it falls off, a new one will grow in its place. he then will have to pluck up his old, curled up talons so new ones can grow and finally, pluck his sticky feathers as these will be replaced also with new ones. imagine, how painful that is! when all this is done and his new feathers, beak and talons grow back, he then goes on this very famous flight of rebirth. i really can't believe an eagle has to go through all these to achieve rebirth, but he does...

this was the gist of a recollection given to us by our community's (CFC-FFL) young and very dynamic spiritual director, Fr. Lando Gabutera. I was deeply touched by this story and had come to reflect on all the changes and struggles my life has undergone. now, i am inclined to believe that all these are but painful processes of rebirth. i have come to accept that i may not have been a good steward of the many blessings that our good Lord has bestowed on me, especially on the aspect of my family because i have opted for the easy way out... one that could scar my children for life. in short, i regret all this has to happen to "our" lives but then, i tend to believe that our Lord makes things happen for a reason, a reason that He alone knows, that He alone comprehends. i cannot call this "the" radical change of my life but can call it as one that may lead to "my" radical decision to achieve a very painful rebirth. in the spirit of lent, i would like to enjoin you my dear friends and readers to reflect on what that radical decision was in your life? and what struggles have you undergone to achieve that painful rebirth.

thanks to Fr. Lando for finding the time amidst his very busy schedule, on a palm sunday at that to be with us all. big thanks likewise goes to tito paolo and tita tess for providing the community the space for yesterday's recollection. may this lenten season give us reason to reflect on the life, the hardship's and eventual death of our Lord for all our sins. ciao y'all!!!

really glad to have known you...

a dear friend recently passed away unexpectedly. just got the sad news this morning while on my marketing chores and really had me in shock! you see, this friend was a "tindera" (vendor) in a nearby market here in our place. my acquaintance with this "tindera" was based on a "suki-tindera (customer-vendor) relationship. i favored this "suki" of mine over the others as she most often gives me discounts on practically everythting that i bought on their stall. i say their's because the stall is being run & managed by their entire family; mom, dad and younger brothers and with my "suki" herself manning the late morning to late afternoon shift. she strikes me as a very hardworking person and in a short tete-a-tete with her, came to know that their entire family was not from these parts but from the island of luzon as well. she's a very jolly person, very talkative and she seem to have this knack of luring customers into buying stuff that they sell. you see, a greater part of my time is spent on the market being in the food business and all. and this young lady would always holler in her big booming voice this words: "kuuyyyyyaaaa! bili na! kumusta ang araw natin?!" those were almost always her words upon seeing me approaching their stall. she almost always brings a smile to my face with her funny salesmanship and antics, and her funny stories and what i like to call "market-talk". whats unique is that, she would always ask not only me but her other customers as well this question: ... kumusta po ang araw natin? (how was your day?). funny but, i was never one that responds to this kind of questions especially late afternoons when i am already tired from working the whole day and just would like to finish up and head home for some much needed rest and a cold shower. but she seems to really have this keen sense of knowing how you're feeling and would instantly blurt out a funny joke which would almost always put a smile on my face. in short, she'd perk up my daily late afternoon marketing interesting. in her, i found that the daily toils of our lives can be as interesting as well, its just the point of looking for a way to make it more interesting. i just want you to know michelle (yup, thats her name), wherever you may be now, that you are going to be missed, not just by me but all the others whose lives you have touched in one way or the other. farewell, my friend.

rain, rain, rain

there hasn't been a drop of rain since the start of the year and we are now beginning to feel its effects. there has been rotating brownouts of at least 5-6 hours per day and its really getting into the nerves of some people, me included. the power company expects it to get much worst and if the rains don't come this may or earlier, the power deficit may get much worst. at present, we are having power shortages of up to 400 mw and its still early march! i dread at the thought of what will happen if this continues. a great portion of the whole country is practically dependent on hydro power so water is a must to get these power plants working. i also wish that the government has contingency plans regarding this... and government people are so busy now with the elections coming this may and hopefully, they won't focus much on it (the elections) and instead put to task some people to look for alternative power sources to address the huge shortage the country is experiencing now. agricultural food sources are greatly affected already, rice and other staples included, and is expected to post record prices due to its scarcity plus some medium and small scale bussinesses are already reeling from the effects of these power outages. here in mindanao, there is really no pronounced dry season as compared to luzon because rain is well scattered all throughout the year, supposedly, but now its different... last year, january to be exact, came the rains which practically submerged our city rendering thousands of people homeless and moving to higher grounds with damages running into the hundreds of millions of pesos. this year has been the exact opposite. DRY! so my dear friends, i ask you to please storm the heavens and include us all in your prayers so that the rains will come early this year, not so much so that we'll all go under water again, but just enough so that farmers can plant again and this power outages will be restored back to normal. ciao!

parang aso?!!!?

ang hirap pala pag nag-iisa ka sa mundo... katulad ng isang aso na gumagala sa lansangan, walang malinaw na direksyon na patutunguhan. lakad ng lakad, gutom at nag-iisa. minsan binabato, sinisipa, pinandidirihan, kinukutya't nililibak, kulang na lang patayin ka. malungkot, pero sadya sigurong ganyan ang buhay, at ang tao... minsan malupit, walang awa at walang pang-unawa, pero masuwerte pa din kung minsan ang isang asong gala, lingid sa kanya ang tunay na kahalagahan ng buhay, may sariling mundo, naghihintay ng panahon kung saan, kailan at paano matatapos ang paglalakbay... hihinto at hihimlay... upang hindi na kailanman maglakbay... paano na kaya kung ang tao itinuring na parang aso???!!!